2021 State of the Meeting Listening Session

21 February 2021

Present: Lo Hamm, Amy Cooke, Gordon Starr, Bhakti Banning, Kathy McCreery, Dianne Marshall, Crystal Scanlon, Doug Hamm, Dorothy Henderson, Rafael Diaz, Don McCormick.

State of the Meeting, 2021

• Things we are doing well
• Problems and concerns
• Activities that strengthened our meeting
• Things that may have weakened our meeting
• What other meetings might learn from us

New Committee Structure

The new committee structure is working quite well. It has brought energy to the Meeting and streamlined our Meeting for Business.

We continue to lose members as they age and die. We have very few young families. However, the ones we have are very faithful about coming to Meeting.

I worry that if we stop our Zoom meetings, we will lose the participation of those who do not live in the area.  Yet, I really miss meeting in person.

–       I Appreciate Zoom

o   Crystal has joined us

o   It Allows us to stay in touch with people who are distant

o   There’s an intimacy that isn’t present in the mtg house that comes from things like seeing people in their homes, and their cats.

Rafael – not a fan of zoom but amazed how easy you’ve made it for me to be part of meeting. it will be wonderful to meet in person. 

11:55 I am a latino. I want to commend you with the way you’ve been struggling with issues of racial equity. The depth has been wonderful to me. You were models for me on how to think about some of these issues. For example, Dorothy talking about how people react with firmness and love. I’m grateful.   

Crystal. I feel welcome. If feel so connected even though I’m so far away. I’m surprised that this happened in Zoom. I’m native American. I’m happy to see how well meeting is tackling racial issues, and how meeting is trying so hard to address issues of racial equality.  Since I’m so far away, I hesitate to make too many commitments to meeting.

–       Chamba. We tried meeting physically and on zoom at the same time. We tried it. It wasn’t greatly successful. I hope this hybrid thing is realized in the country in the future.

–       Dorothy. WUTR. It started in our living room over a year ago. It started out as the white fragility reading group. We looked at the number of people in our meeting who have been in it and it’s impressive. Another person in her meeting said that the people in her meeting’s reading group are the activists. In our group there are people who identify themselves as activists and some who identify as contemplatives. It is the source of some strength of the group. It’s a strength of our meeting. we receive strength from the meeting at large and we bring back strength from it. Zoom makes it possible.

–       Children’s program has been stable. People show up every week. We have a diversity of programming. The sadness is that if Lily doesn’t come we are left with two children. /started with difficulties finding teachers/

–       Zoom isn’t so optimal. I wondered at one point, is it worth it to continue children’s ed? But then someone I talked about this said, “It brings Quakerism alive in our home.” It is for the children, but it also serves us. If we can go back to the meeting house, it will blossom some of our children. But I also hope it still can be hybrid so we can do that an still have Lily and Grace.

–       Doug. A byproduct of the fire at SFC is that the grinding rocks of the Nisenan were revealed and it made clear that we are living in a place that has been occupied by humanity for many years. Taking a cue from Visalia meeting. we have an opportunity to examine our relations with the Nisenan. Where our mtg house resides, it’s in a tradition. We have a lot of work to do in terms of discernment. 

–       Dorothy. The process of us coming into four committees. It has been successful. Specifically S & W putting together oversight with peace and justice. We think this is working well.

–       A group in the meeting read white fragility. My grandmother’s hands, and then how to be an antiracist. Let them know that this is progress. 

–       We are doing something called barn raising in second hour. It has been remarkable to use that process. It would be useful to write about how we use it. It’s been really powerful / QUARTERLY? PYM?/ it has a quaker feel to it.

–       Dianne. The story of our children’s ed group can be shared with other meetings. It has become joyous, not a grudge. Teachers build on each others’ lessons. I’ve seen FDS that killed the spirit instead of building it. Part of it is the chemistry of the right people coming together.

–       INC. clearness committee.

–       Good job of welcoming new people. Welcoming people has struggled with how to do this in the age of Zoom. 

–       Internet presence. Has been strong.

–       Welcoming committee is strong. 

–       Internet presence. Web page. Facebook brought in people.

–       The committees are working well. I like the names. Welcome instead of hospitality. Stewardship as a name. People enjoy the work.

–       The ministry of music is great. Brings in people. Some people, like David Hartsough, show up for it. We offer it and it is rare. 

–       We lost the Kewmans, Amy and Chamba have left town. Several people died. We aren’t sure where we will meet. 

–       Zoom leaves me wondering about the transition back to face to face meeting and how we can do that. Before covid when we tried to do this, it was difficult. Laptop with camera. Face to face meeting has benefits and problems. So does zoom. Some things don’t work as well. I’m concerned about that transition. I’m concerned about what our home will be. SFC? We will figure this out but its hard to see way open. 

–       People love and wonder how we do the children’s program, singing, committee structure.

–       Chamba. As covid came in, what are we gonna do? Children’s program? With us? And we’ve done something. Covid will slowly be less of a problem. And now we have a new problem. People who can’t attend. And where are we going to meet. It seems probably that we will meet in the old meeting house but we may meet in town. Our problems can be opportunities.

–       Amy. Ben Lomond is doing a weekend workshop on hybrid meetings. I hope we can send two people to it in the spring.

–       Doug. We are on the cusp of needing tech help as we form a future for ourselves. We may want to research what is out there in terms of tech aids. Mark Kewman may know his he’s in the radio business. There are people who are out there who can help us with hybrid meetings. 

–       /ask Rachel – schools? Hybrid?/

–       Amy. This is the first State of the Meeting session I’ve attended where concern about too much work with too few people hasn’t been expressed. And I’ve attended this mtg for 20 years. I worry. I relinquish many of the roles I’ve held. Clergy do lots of practical things. Answer mail. Do outreach. We rely on volunteers. I hope that someday quakers can fund administrative help for our meetings. It would help grow our meeting. 

–       Dorothy. Worship is very deep, sustaining. It’s surprising how able I am to sink down and feel connected to spirit. The ministry that comes from a deep well. Worship that comes from meeting is nourishing to my spiritual life.

–       Chamba. There is spirit in the committees. In the book group for sure.

–       Dianne. Challenges. SFC is a blessing but it interferes with people joining us. It’s hard for newcomers to go there. 

–       Fosten. Lauren, Paul Hartsough, Peggy Baldwin, for many people Zoom doesn’t work. 

–       Hilary Joanna. Don.  we didn’t do a good job of supporting them when they were evicted. They didn’t feel supported. It was difficult. We tried to support them. 

–       Chamba. There was a lot of personal trauma and history of trauma that I see personally, I/we did not know how to interact with that.

–       We got a lot more support from the larger community of grass valley and Nevada city than from meeting. We felt support from individuals from meeting but not so much from the meeting as a whole, but yes the county as a whole.

–       Dorothy. I did call Hilary. As a meeting as a whole, do we want to look at what to do when people who –how are we doing when it comes to taking care of people. How can we do a better job of this.

–       Amy. We felt spiritually supported by the quaker community. And quakers outside the meeting. Doug and Dorothy helped us sift through the ashes. So many people reached out to us. People housed, fed us. We were stunned that there were people who cooked every meal for us. There are all sorts of ways that we support one another. We are a small meeting, it’s hard to do meal trains and know what to do. Most people contributed to the go fund me campaigns. 

–       Amy and Chamba’s contribution to Joanna was impressive.

–       Dorothy. We used to have all these families that came. Slowly  over time they didn’t come to meeting. I’d send email. And called. Eventually I stopped. I almost fell like I’d be bothering people now. There are folks we don’t see and are we staying in touch with them?

–       Crystal. Could there be a committee for welcoming and support? People who volunteer. Hey, you check in on this person. You check in on that person. 

–       Rafael. This does make sense. It’s hard to ask for help when you need it. Its hard to offer help. Maybe the process of meeting needs is easier if it is formalized. Maybe have a couple of people you can go to if you have special needs. Not sure what structure it is. 

–       We did that. Anita was a force for that.

–       Dorothy. In Orange Grove meeting. They have a pastoral care committee. My friend/niece/? has her three or four people. She contacts them. Sees how they are doing. She may not be most faithful attender, but she is faithful with these people. Have these people held in a spiritual way. 

–       Chamba. Part of the problem is the fact of zoom. Not having a face to face meeting. This was done with elderly or people with a physical problem. We had done this. Maybe it should be a meeting wide commitment, not just a committee doing it. 

–       What caused the children’s ed boom? Ministry did a survey-what are the most important committees. The two committees that were on top were m and c and children’s. once that happened. God wouldn’t allow me to avoid children’s ed, even though I was convinced I was terrible at it. 

–       Hailey is a reason. She always shows up. Is totally committed. 

–       Dianne. I did receive a lot of Joanna’s anger and unhappiness. I worked with spirit and witness committee. In an awkward way, we provided a safety net. We did do this well. 

–       Crystal. Children’s program. I found out about it through the youth coordinator for PYM. I asked her which meetings have a children’s program. She said I think Santa Monica does, but for sure grass valley does. Having other know about the children’s program helped. 

–       Amy. We have tendrils into quarterly and yearly meeting

–       Co-clerks have worked hard all year during this year of transition and difficulty—work to ground our meeting in spiritual presence and tackle practical things.

–       Dorothy. How many co-clerks do you know who are also Donald the Bear and Benjy Bear every fourth week. Now I have Joey the bear because they didn’t want me to be without a teddy bear.

–       They had personal stuff going on and still did the work. They were aware of covid before many other people. 

–       D and A contributed to INC. the clearness committee exercise was very good. 

–       George Lakey. Not great outreach. 

–       2021 state of the meeting listening session

Friends shared out of worship

Zoom: other people joining us from different locations, intimacy of being in people’s living rooms, seeing their cats.  Not having to travel, having Friends who have moved, becomes possible with Zoom. Seeing other people’s faces in Zoom

Newcomer:  Felt so welcome, very warm way, wonderful conversation, faithfulness group, clearness committee.  Smooth transition.  As a group, not a fan of Zoom – amazed at how easy it has been to be part of the group.

Newcomer/Race/Latino:  issues of race have been predominant.  Commend with struggling with racial inequality – depth of the questioning and the pain and the discernment and how to respond.  Wonderful thing for me as a Latino – in response to the tragic events of the last year, models for how to respond.  Sharing of analogy with parenthood – a parent responds with love and firmness.

Newcomer: Welcomed and connected – so far away – so connected even so. Surprise that that could happen in Zoom.  As a NAtive American – happy to see how the meeting has been tackling the racial issues, the Quaker community is trying really hard to address racial inequalities.  Not sure what the next step is – because of distance.  Hesitant about commitment. 

Hybrid Meeting – Zoom and Physical meeting at the same time:  We did try it, and it is a possibility.  Personal desire for that. 

Waking up to Race group:  Started in Doug and Dorothy’s living room in January 2020.  White Fragility Reading Group.  Doing it now for a year – many people have been part of the group at various times.  Blend of people who identify as both activist and contemplative Quakers. Strength of process in that group – spiritual searching as well as how we can bring action into the world.  WE receive strength from the Meeting at large and bring strength to the Meeting as well.

Children’s Program:  remarkable staying power and strength.  Shifted one teacher, otherwise very stable. Diversity of programming.  If Lily does not come back, left with 2 children – only one of whom is local.  Wondering – do we have a viable program? Zoom is not as optimal for Children’s Program.  One parent said that this program brings Quakerism alive.  The teachers also gain as much if not more than the children!  If we are able to go back to the Meetinghouse, hope we can stay hybrid and that we can meet in person.

Restructuring of the committees:  Greatly appreciate the integration of the STewardship Committee -library and newsletter being in the committee – Calmness and focus and energy from all committees

Anticipation:  byproduct of the fire – the grinding rocks from the Nisenan are prominently revealed.  We are living in a place that has been occupied for a long time.  Peaceful people, stable people, refined ecological practices.  Cue from Visalia meeting – relationship with native people.  Examine deeply our relations with the native people.  Where our meetinghouse resides is on 236 acres – that organization – Sierra Friends Center –  is in transition.  How can we support a new era of relationship? How can we give this our best wisdom?  A more just world, a more peaceful world.  

What are some things that other meetings can learn from us?  

• Process of us restructuring our committees – speak to the success of that.  Spirit and Witness – putting Peace and Social Justice with the Ministry Committee was not obvious and it is working well.  
• Specify that a group in the meeting has read White Fragility, My Grandmother’s HAnds, How to be an AntiRacist- books recommended by Yearly Meeting.  
• Barnraising – a process in Waking Up to Race – worship sharing in the first hour and then barn raising process (simplified version).  Really powerful for us as a second option.
• Intergenerational Education group – sense of joy among the teachers – share with other meetings.  Building on each other’s lessons.  First Day school is nurturing the spirit in our meeting.
• Welcoming spirit is very strong.
• Welcoming Committee:  become strong.  The work online with Facebook and the Webpage has been strong.  That has been robust, worked well.  
• Committees are working well.  These committees are doing their work, and a feeling of a lot getting done and people are enjoying it
• Ministry of Music:  brings in people, a part of our worship and part of our wholeness.  

Problems:

• Kewmans transferred ot meeting
• Several people have passed away
• Amy and Chamba moving
• Not sure where we will meeting for M4W
• Zoom – how to transition – face-to-face meeting
• Hybrid meeting is difficult – different mediums – how to make that work?
• There are things we get with face-to-face that we do not get by Zoom
• Sierra Friends Center – concerns about our home and where that might be.  And, faith that we are al in it together.  Hard to see the way forward
• As Covid was coming in we were in a position of not knowing what to do.  We have done something – we are in the same place. Covid will ease a problem – a new problem will be arise.  There will be a new solution.  Problems are opportunities.
• Will Meeting move?  

(ASIDE) Hybrid Meeting Workshop at Ben Lomond Quaker Center – send at least 2 people?

• Cusp of needing some techno-savvy help as we formulate a future for ourselves.  We might want to research technological aids and how to get that knowledge into our meeting. Individuals could help us.  
• Administrative tasks are all volunteer, and if one person leaves it can leave us wobbly.  Could we hire administrative help?  And, this is one of the only years we have not shared a lack of people power 
• SFC is a blessing and a challenge.  It is hard to get to.  It is a difficulty for newcomers.  
• Zoom does not work for everyone – that is a problem.  There are many people in our meeting who have not joined us because we are on Zoom.
• Two active members of the meeting, when they were evicted from their homes, did not feel supported by our meeting and our community.  We were slow in responding to their needs.  They have both stopped coming to meeting – no one reached out.  We did not do a great job responding to members of our community who were in great need.
  • Personal trauma for these members of our meeting – not knowing how to interact with that.  When other members lost their house, they got a lot of support from outside the meeting.  What does this show us?
  • As a meeting as a whole, when we have members who do not feel supported by our meeting, how are we doing at taking care of folks that are part of us?
  • It is hard and complex to know how to respond to people in a crisis.  And, looking at it is a wonderful step.
  • Spiritual support was there for people in crisis.  Not only the practical support.
• There are folks we do not see and we have not done a great job keeping in touch
• Zoom is part of the problem in keeping in touch with people
• There have been efforts to keep up with sick and elderly people

Some ideas were shared:

• Committee to be added – support for others?  People checking on people.  If an emergency comes up, then somecan can help coordinate assistance.  
• It is hard to ask for help when you need and it is hard to offer help when you do not know if others need it.  Formalized by some people.  Make it overt and clear.  We want to support you.  Make it explicit.  
• Orange Grove Meeting – take the whole meeting and divide people up, those people have 3-4 people and forge an on-going relationship with, and have them held spiritually and practically.  Support for this was spoken into the gathering.  

Before Children’s Program became revitalized, there were a lot of problems.  It went from bad to an explosion of activity.  What caused this?

• Survey – Children’s Program identified as one of the most important committees
• Being led to step outside of comfort zone

Context of Joanna – as newsletter editor, received a lot of anger. A process of receiving and bringing people in who can be heard.  Not everyone can receive from everyone.  

Children’s Program:  Newcomer came in through Rebekah Percy, Youth programs coordinator from PacYM.  Children program recommendation. We were known in the larger Quaker community.

Worship is deep and sustaining. Able to sink down and sink down into spirit.  Our spiritual experience – very nourishing to our spiritual lives

The committees – the spiritual is in the committees and book group – feeding itself.  

Co-clerks:  Brought Spiritual and practical strength to the meeting. Personal issues, still stepped up to the plate.    Don the Bear and Benjy the Bear, teach First Day School.  That was great.  Wonderful contributors to Interfaith Nevada County, sharing the Clearness Committee exercise.  

Amy – talked about Quakerism with Interfaith as well.  

The George Lakey workshop happened in January.  Attended well from the community.  Outreach – was this effective?  No flyers picked up